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People sometimes ask us how to get a co-worker,
employee or friend to come to CARS. We appreciate being asked,
and we recommend these things:
1. Remember to treat the person, as you would wish to be treated, that is,
with dignity.
2. Speak with the person privately unless you are afraid that person may be
violent towards you. If you are afraid of the latter, call us and we will
coach you in how to assess whether someone is violent and how to handle such
situations.
3. Refer to someone's behavior, how he/she acts, not who he/she is. For example,
do not tell someone that he/she is an alcoholic. It is critical not to diagnose
--it is not necessary or helpful; and also may place you in an ADA dilemma
(where the employee maintains you saw him/her as disabled and owe him/her
reasonable accommodation).
4. Realize you cannot force people to see a counselor or psychologist. If you
are a manager, academic or nonacademic supervisor, you can require that people
rehabilitate themselves if their personal problems are affecting their work
performance. But, you cannot require they use a particular method of rehabilitation,
such as counseling or mediation. It is best to allude to specific performance
problems as you refer in a more formal situation.
5. Share with the person your concern and encourage him/her to call us (have
the number with you and call us in advance so that we can be as alert as
possible to the concerns you have).
6. Stress that counseling can provide people with support and help in problem
solving.
7. Some individuals still feel working on their personal problems with a therapist
is more embarrassing than having those problems. If you are referring someone,
you may need to help them past this sense of shame. They need to understand
that we all have problems and that having a sounding board is one way of
addressing those problems.
8. Realize that CARS services may not be the appropriate level of service for
everyone and we will refer him/her to the best possible alternative.
9. If you want us to confirm someone came here, let us know. We will ask him/her
for a release if he/she does call in. If he/she refuses, we cannot even tell
you he/she has called -- even when we really may want to, we cannot give you
any information without a release, unless the person's in danger and we judge
you are the best person to help.
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